:::::swoon:::::

choice... or chance?

in doing some digging for an old paper from undergrad days gone-by, I ran across this.
Someone had it emailed to me my freshman year in college and I liked it so much that I not only printed it out and posted it to my hot pink and zebra corkboard #collegeinearlymilleniumyears but I also took the time to retype it so it wouldnt be lost.

I also found a lot of old saved IM conversations with B. some that reassure me I wasnt crazy/didnt just dream up that it was really that good back then. and some that make the older, wiser?, more jaded? me cringe a bit on how immature and black/white I was about my relationships.

so for what it's worth, I'll try to keep this in mind. for the next time I fall in love :)

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Choice or Chance?

When we meet the right person to love, when we're at the right place at the right time, that's chance.

When you meet someone you're attracted to, that's not a choice. That's chance.

Being caught up in a moment (and there are a lot of couples who get together because of this)That's also a chance.

The difference is what happens afterwards…
Will you take that infatuation, that crush,
or that mind- blowing attraction to the next level?
That's when all sanity comes back…
You have to sit down and contemplate
whether you want to make this into a concrete relationship or just a fling.

If you decide to love a person, even with his faults, that's not a chance. That's choice

When you choose to be with a person, no matter what, that's choice.

Even if you know there are many people out there who are more attractive, smarter, and richer than your mate, and yet, you decide to love your mate just the same, that's choice

Infatuation, crushes, and attraction come to us by chance.
But true love that lasts is truly a choice. A choice that we make…

Regarding soulmates, there's a beautiful movie quote that I believe is so true about this:
"Fate brings you together, but it's still up to you to make it happen."

I believe that soulmates do exist, that there is truly someone made for you.
But it's still up to you to make the choice if you're going to do something about it or not.

We may meet our soulmates by chance, but loving and staying with our soulmate is still a choice we have to make.

We came to the world not by finding someone perfect to love, BUT to learn how to love an imperfect person perfectly.
~Author Unknown~

Buon Natale!

"You know that point in your life when you realize that the house you grew up in isn’t really your home anymore…all of the sudden even though you have some place to put your shit, that idea of home is gone…or maybe it's like this rite of passage…you will never have that feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, for your kids, for the family you start. It’s like a cycle or something. Maybe that’s all family really is: a group of people that miss the same imaginary place."
-Garden State-

So...this is what Christmas is to me.
This is why it's my absolute favorite time of the whole entire year.
Because for a magical 3-4 days, that "same imaginary place that everyone misses" is re-created.
everyone is in the same house. on uncomfortable air-mattresses because Grandma and Grandpa have to have separate bedrooms or they keep each other awake snoring.
and all of our crap is there.
and the presents we spent too much money/not enough thought picking out.
and there are little kids with sticky fingers,
and late-night wine on the back-porch with my mom/best friend who i've missed terribly,
and dogs who eat entire pies off the counter top, a
nd sappy cards from my broke college-kid brother that make my mom cry,
and last-minute newspaper-used-as-wrapping-paper,
and Gran mixing up all of our names,
and wayyyyy too much food,
and the inevitable fight because we're all having to co-exist in the same space together again.



and its just fcuking fantastic.