Ode to Singleness

• Sleeping late on Saturday with only your own obligations to blow off
  
• Rationalizing tequila as a vegetable because it comes from the agave plant
  
• Burning dinner… and not stressing over anyone going hungry or being grumpy
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• being a “sports enthusiast” when there are cute guys at a sports bar
  
• Buying the “good stuff” & not having to share it with anyone else (*this applies to food, wine/ liquor)
  
• S&TC & chick flicks marathons
  
• Eating ice cream any time of night, picking out all the cookies outta the cookies-n-cream, AND leaving the bowl on the nightstand.
  
• Getting your drinks bought… even if it’s a guy you’d never go out with
  
• No (future) mom-in-laws who “admire” your “birthing” hips or criticize everything about you
  
• Listening to really bad music and singing along off-key without criticism about your taste in music… or your voice
  
• “having hot revenge sex with total strangers” (nod to the greatness that is 27 Dresses )
  
• the toilet seat ALWAYS being in the correct position
  
• Only your own dysfunctional family to deal with at holidays and long weekends
  
• Sole possession of the remote control
  
• No annoying whisker hairs all over the sink (*or for the guys – no rings of leg hair around the tub)
  
• VEGAS baby!